Many a skeptical comment has been offered up toward the high
throne of numerous indomitable statisticians of this world from the humble
paradise of self-proclaimed realists.
Football, it has been argued, isn’t a game of numbers – such as
completion percentage and rushing attempts – but rather a game defined by the
almighty alphabet – as in Ws and Ls.
Personally, I’ve always wondered if the realists would care
to define the amount of Ws and Ls in some measure that defies numerical
process. But that’s splitting straws, so
I’m told, so I feel compelled to bring the conversation back to present reality
in a fashion that pleases far more than one, and certainly not less than all.
So let’s talk some Cowboys football.
What about the Cowboys? you ask. Will they run their record
to 3-1 for the first time in five years with a win over San Diego on Sunday?
Well, according to statistical analysis of previous games,
it has been concluded that their hopes of getting away from the sleepy .500
doldrums that the patrons of Valley Ranch have so long loved are... [drum roll]
...next to nil. Nada, as in zero. Zero as in L.
L as in .500. .500 as in Jerry
World.
The 21st Century has been unkind to the Cowboys
in a plethora of fashions, but particularly when it comes to winning a season’s
fourth game. For what it’s worth, in
thirteen attempts since 2000, the Cowboys have managed a woeful 3-10 mark in
the fourth contest of a season.
The only wins during that span have come against woefully
inferior opponents. Dallas
nipped the Kurt Warner-less Rams 13-10 in 2002 on a late Billy Cundiff field
goal, manhandled Arizona a year later by a
24-7 score, and then annihilated a poor St.
Louis club 35-7 in 2007.
The losses, while plentiful, have certainly not lacked for
drama. Included in the list is Terrell
Owens’ dance on the star at Texas Stadium in 2000, and Tony Romo’s second-half
collapse against the Lions in 2011.
Among the ten defeats is an 0-3 mark against AFC West
opponents, which should attract attention considering the divisional locale of
this week’s foe.
San Diego
may not be a playoff team this year, but then again they might be. Each of their three games has come down to
the final seconds, and if not for a fourth quarter meltdown in the secondary
against Tennessee, they would share an
identical 2-1 record with Dallas.
Will the Cowboys get the W this weekend?
Just look at the numbers to find the likely letter.
